Bob Sakamano

chik fil a

When cows are mad at each other, do they have beef?

2 birds 1 stone

Dear Humans,

The sooner you stop throwing stones at us the sooner we stop shitting on your cars, kapeesh?

-Birds

:*(

OH no the worlds largest elephant is feared dead!!

AHHH how can we sleep at night?!?!?

let's hope its photoshopped

If this is real, I am never leaving my house.

Read more about it here: http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,275524,00.html

The weight

As I was walking to school today, I saw a guy walking his dog. He was typical frat-style looking college guy - the guy you typically see trying to chug 1,000 beers at the bar - except for one thing. The dog he was walking was The...Girliest...Dog...Ever. It was a white, cute, cuddly, fluffy, tiny poodle attached to this poor guy by a tiny cutesy leash. I couldn't help but crack a smile when I walked by him, and he returned my smile with a look somewhere in between hatred and utter despair. He probably thinks I was mocking him. But I wasn't; instead, I was merely acknowledging that he made a tough decision.

Any retard knows that he didn't pick this dog out; his girlfriend did. Obviously, when they were looking for a dog, she saw this one and loved it, and he considered the repercussions of a veto. But he knew, if he were to use his veto power, and they got a different dog that was less fruity, every time she looked at that dog and remembered the one she really wanted, that guy was not getting any pussy that night.

So he weighed his choices, and he made a decision. He accepted the fact that by getting this dog, all of his friends are going to rag on him for it at least three times a week, and every now and then, some guy he doesn't know is going to look at him and think he is a pussy. But, if he is willing to go through all of that...think about how amazing his girlfriends vagina must be?

question of the day

Do gay monkeys have super aids? Or do two negatives make a positive and they are perfectly fine?

question of the day

If an invertebrate steps on a crack, does anything happen to its mother?

dark side lost we have

Guess what?  We lost another Jedi Knight.  Samuel L Jackson, also known as Master Mace Windu, has officially gone to the dark side.

It all started when "Snakes on a Plane" came out.  We knew he liked snakes, but were not sure to what extent.  Now with Black Snake Moan, we started to worry.  So we followed him around, only to find him going into this guys layer...

question of the day

With all this news of retarded mice, it got me wondering.

Is mustard retarded too?  Is there non-tarded mustard?

I guess it would just be called mus.  I also guess that it would taste much smarter.

just shutup

It used to just be Chicken.  The only thing we had to worry about.  Just make sure you wash it clean and refrigerate in a timely manner after bringing it out.  Every once in a while it would make the news and it was happy.

Then it was Spinach, which was kind of odd, but we brushed it off.  We gave it a few front pages and that was enough.

Now, it's peanut butter.  PEANUT BUTTER! It's been around since the late 1800's and hadn't said a word.  I guess it couldn't take it, it was just too damn jealous.  It wanted to be on the front page too.  It said "If Britney shaving her head is big news, wait till you see what I can do.  Anna Nicole ODing? Ha!"  So what did it do? It did the only thing food can do, contract salmonella.

Well FUCK YOU peanut butter, I don't care.  Jelly sandwiches are A O K.

And you know what?  What is with all of these animals trying to eat people to make the news too?  Would you just give it a break?  We KNOW you all can eat people, you are animals, remember?