Bob Sakamano

mom and dad = lam0rz

I wish my parents were cool.

When I was 11, they got me one of these for my birthday.

Click below to see what Davita Fuller from Anderson Indiana got her 11 year old daughter!

anybody have any loaded guns, machetes or any other dangerous objects to lend an australian family?

Australians are great parents.

Take this for example.

Alicia Cotter, mother extraordinaire, has a two year old son named Noah.  They also have a dog named Cassey.  Noah is a nice regular two year old boy.  One day he decided to play with Cassey and he pulled on his ears.  Coincidentally, Cassey, a Mastiff, decided he wasn't cool with it and proceeded to maul the boy.  With deep cuts and scratches all over the left side of his face, his mother has decided to blame her son in the incident and has decided to keep the dog.  Noah, two years old, agrees, "Cassey is a good dog".

Highlights of the story include:

Noah was covered in blood and crying hysterically when Ms Cottier pulled him away from the dog and dialled triple-0.

"There was blood everywhere, and he was screaming," she said.

Ambulance officers from the Hunter Westpac Rescue Helicopter attended to Noah and deemed him "the luckiest boy alive".

always remember the jimmy hat

Originally, I had planned on writing a jimmy joke about your momma that you might not like.  But instead I decided to put a recipe that your momma may like.

Traditional Hanukkah Latkas - Potato Pancakes (Parve)

Fried food is traditionally eaten on Hanukkah in commemoration of the oil that miraculously burned for eight days when the Maccabees purified and rededicated the holy Temple in Jerusalem. Fried Potato Pancakes (called Latkes in Yiddish and Levivot in Hebrew) are the hands-down, mouth-open holiday favorite.

INGREDIENTS:

• 5 potatoes
• 2 onions
• 3 eggs
• 2-4 Tbsp. all-purpose flour
• 1 Tbsp. vanilla
• 1 tsp. salt
• 1/4 tsp. pepper
• oil for frying (canola is recommended)

PREPARATION:

1. Peel potatoes. Place in a bowl of cold water so they won’t turn brown.
2. When ready to prepare the latkas, drain the potatoes. Place potatoes and onions in a food processor fitted with a knife blade.

Pulse until smooth. Drain mixture.
3. Pour potato mixture into a large bowl. Add beaten eggs. Add flour. Add salt and pepper.
4. Pour 1 inch of oil into a large, deep frying pan. Heat the oil over medium-high heat.
5. Carefully drop 1/4 cup of the potato mixture into the hot oil.
6. Flatten the pancake slightly so the center will cook.
7. Fry for several minutes on each side until golden brown and cooked through.
8. Drain on paper towels.

lollipop lollipop

If I said it once, I've said it a thousand times. TEACH YOUR KIDS ABOUT TRAIN TRACKS! Infact, if you haven't shown them Stand by Me by the time they are in middle school, then it's too late, you already lost them.

I beg you, don''t make the same mistake this pigeons parents made.

pokey hokey

You got it all wrong, and quite frankly the solution is quite easy.

You can teach your children all you want, but when I am a parent, I will teach them the most valuable thing they could ever learn.  This kind of knowledge can bring a competitive advantage that will put them LIGHT YEARS ahead of a Harvard MBA or Stanford JD.

I am talking about teaching them to LOVE waiting.  Waiting in lines, waiting in traffic, waiting for anything.  Because most of life involves sitting, standing and wondering when it is going to be your turn. Your turn to go, your turn to continue, your turn to get through.

Chances are they won't even make it to their goals.  At least they will enjoy their time waiting for the let down.

And that's what it's all about!

speechless

Mom? Dad? I'd like an explanation.

Or else you will be hearing from my lawyers before the day is over.